I recently taught coaching skills
classes for some leaders at my organization.
In some of the feedback I received, someone brought up a challenge she
was having with one of her direct reports. She was having a tough time recognizing when it is appropriate to coach
and when it is not.
I’ve coached for so long, that it
kind of comes naturally to me to know when I should put on the coach hat. For
others who aren’t used to using the techniques, it can be more confusing. On top of that, it’s a lot of fun to use a
new skill ALL the time, especially, when
you see how effective it can be when working with direct reports. Plus, there’s
the urge to want to want to practice coaching all the time.
It’s important to remember that
coaching is just one of the arsenal of leadership skills, and not the only way
to work with your team. Not all moments
are coachable, and not all people are coachable. Your employee needs to be in a
receptive mindset in order for coaching to work.
Below, I’ve listed a few instances
when coaching would not be the right approach at first, but how the situation
can become coachable moments later on.
1. Urgency – Threat: Coaching takes time and you don’t always have it. If you are in a threat situation or there is
an urgent need to work fast, you will have to be direct. There is always time for coaching once the
crisis is over. As a matter of fact, coaching would be a great choice to use
for a crisis event post-mortem. At this
point you can do a lessons learned, including what worked, what didn’t, what
would we do differently and finally, what can we do to anticipate in the future
to avoid crisis mode. It’s all about balance and determining what is or is not
a crisis. More often, we treat things as
crisis even when they aren’t.
2. Victim: When your direct reports feel and act powerless they will
be unable to commit to an action plan. When people feel they have no power to
change they won’t do anything. They will
spend their time making excuses rather
than taking action. At this point you
will need to show them what is possible by turning the victim mentality around. Find places for them to have small wins and
perhaps a collaborator who has a pro-active mindset.
3. No Sense of Ownership: Something goes wrong and they blame everyone
and everything. You will hear phrases such
as: “It’s not my job,” “That’s not my area,” “I had nothing to do with it.” Accountability belongs to someone else in
their eyes. It’s similar to
“victim.” The difference is that a
victim accepts responsibility and feels unable do anything. Someone who has no ownership feels that they
aren’t responsible. As a leader it’s up
to you to either make them see their part or assign it to them.
4. Capabilities Gap: You will create a lose-lose situation if you try
to coach someone in an area where they have no skills or knowledge. It can affect esteem and make you frustrated.
Since coaching is about discovery, you
can deflate your direct reports if you continue to question in an area where
they just don’t have the answers…yet. When you find people are at a loss for
solutions and they’ve exhausted resources trying to find answers, this may be
the time to either teach or get them the training they need. With that said, coaching can identify the
need to increase skills and knowledge.
5. Limiting Beliefs: What you believe to be true is true. Belief systems will hold them back. Whether it’s a belief about themselves, the
team, the department, or the organization, or even about the world. Biases make us incapable of opening our minds
to possibilities. If you run into this
stumbling block there could be fit issues.
Review whether this person has the right values to be on your team or at
the organization.
6. Lack of Self-Awareness: If
you ask questions about how he feels and he says he doesn’t know, it could show
a lack of self-awareness. (Or it could
be honesty, see below.) If he can’t see
how he contributes to problems and wins, then it’s time to share your point of
view about what you see in your direct report.
It’s up to leaders to give feedback and to share expectations. When you give feedback, it’s best to stick to
observable behaviors and how you interpret those behaviors. This might help spark the conversation. You also may want to consider using outside
coaching services by someone who can assess the situation objectively and give
insight..
7. Lack of Trust and Honesty: If your direct report doesn’t trust you
then you will never get honest answers.
Work on the trust first before trying to coach. Plain and simple.
There are more examples out there
and these might be some of the easy ones to spot in your busy day. If anyone has other scenarios, please share!
With practice and time, it will
become easier to spot and take advantage of a coachable moment!
