I try not to get emotional!

My husband and I began shopping for investment real estate before we were married and before we even owned a house to live in. We lived in Manhattan but wanted to buy a three or four-unit apartment building upstate. Taxes, rent and future flips propelled us. We did great on our first building, making a profit. It's because of Micheal more than me - why? Because he is not emotional when it comes to business.


When we were shopping for buildings, he told me rule number one was: "Don't fall in love with any house." It's only investments and we had to make smart choices and had nothing to do with how a house made us feel. We must buy with our heads.

I would always look as houses from the point of view - "would I live here?" Most of the time the answer was no but, I started to see what Micheal was saying. The place we bought I would never live in but it turned out that we got great rent, we upgraded cheaply and sold at a profit!

Because I create and believe in what I do, I take it very personally. If I get the slightest criticism, I start to doubt myself. If I get praise, I should note the learning experience instead of letting it stroke my ego. I'm trying to learn instead of react.

I also try to not make decisions based on what I want to do but rather, what would make the most sense economically. I would love to go to a million vendor shows, have a booth and talk to everyone that comes by our table. However, some of the shows are very expensive, so instead, I buy a ticket and walk about with business cards and brochures and I pick up other's cards. With the cards I collect, I send them emails to ask them to join my non-profit. It's a lot of work to walk around and approach strangers. It's easier to let them come to me. Yet, it was cheaper and hopefully, will produce the same results.

I would like to hire a web designer and manager but, it's not the best use of business funds right now, so I do all the work. It gets frustrating, tiring and I will hire at some point but, right now I need to do the financially sound thing.

Emotions in business can be a good thing - the whole go with your gut thing...but, your head is a better bet.

SAHM vs. WAHM

I spent a little time as a Stay-at-Home-Mom in the fall after I was laid off from my full time job. It was a lot of work. It was so very different. Stressful because of the loss of income. I did have to job hunt and go on interviews, but for the most part, I took care of the kids. When the economy dictated that I work I became a Work-at-Home-Mom. I have too tell you, the former is much easier than the latter -- for me.

As a WAHM I have to do all the stuff a SAHM does plus try to find clients, work for my clients and all the administrative stuff, too. Plus, I have two "jobs." One being my coaching and the other my non-profit. I find I loose my patience more because my to-do list is much longer. If I have only my family to tend to, I find it much easier.

As WAHM, everyone thinks that since I'm home, I have time to hang out, go shopping, one-on-one playdates and talk on the phone. To be honest, I had more time to talk to my friends when I worked full time than being at home full time.

Even my husband thinks that I can do all kinds of home care. When I used to go to the office, I still had to do home care but at least at the office, I didn't have to clean up spilled OJ, do some marketing, call the dr., go to the DMV - all with the kids.

Granted my kids are little and a bit far from all being school age. My oldest will be in full time pre-k but, my youngest will be home. And my husband wants a third. Ugh.

I wonder if I can be successful at being a mom and a business woman. There are many that argue that I will do harm to my kids because I have to park them in front of the TV for times I when need some quiet. I jump for joy at nap time for the 2 hours of uninterrupted work time. I can't do the one-on-one play time and when I take them to the library it's a quick trip - the park, too.

Where's my husband some might say? Well, he's working two gigs to help pay the bills and keep us from loosing our house. I pitches in when he can but since he's currenlty bringing in more money, I have to pull the house weight. One of the reasons I have to work is so that I can contribute to our survival and then Micheal can spend more time with the kids.

To SAHM's argument, I want to stay attached and relevant to the work world in case I want to go back full time or a full time opportunity presents itself. I know several that are having a hard time finding work after being out and their husbands are out of work, too. I also, know that when all my kids are in school it'll be hard to justify being home while they're at school.

Also, I have to argue that I love what I do. I think that I'm teaching my daughters the joy of having work that I'm passionate about. It makes me complete to have something other then my children to focus on.

The best thing about WAHM is the ability to be able to take care of my kids when they need me and I don't have to try to "get out of work" or negotiate with my husband on who should take the day off.

I like being a WAHM much more than I thought I would. I go to networking event for my social out reach, plus, I do play-dates, too.

I just hope that I can find a rhythm to my life so that I can keep my sanity while trying to make a living and take care of my kids.

When Family Visits During a Launch

Opus=Work * Vesta=Goddess of family * Ego=Self/Consciousness

There are many times when we do not have the option to say "No" to visitors. Usually this means family. My husband's Aunt is visiting and I love it when she comes. My girls just adore her and she always plays with them! She is a very interesting woman who has been working VERY hard the last 5 years on getting a center built in Afghanistan for children and widows. I'm amazed by her tenacity and determination in fund raising and in construction in a foreign country. I'm very proud to be related to her!

She's in New York to see us and timed it with a fundraiser that she is sponsoring.

The hard part about her visit and this is true with all visitors to my house - I want to make sure they have what they need, they are entertained and are having a good time. This can be stressful enough when we are not busy but add a launch and it becomes even more stressful.

There are many steps we can do to help the craziness and anxiety that can result --

1. First, plan ahead and know that you will be limited on what you can accomplish when you have visitors.
2. Pare down your to-do list and limit clients as much as possible.
3. If you can reschedule, do it. Most people are understanding and flexible.
4. Put in your gratitude journal that it is wonderful to have family and friends who care enough about you and your family to visit!
5. Negotiate up front about expectations on their visit. If you have clients let your visitors know when you have to work with them. Make a calendar or list for them. They won't remember nor, do they have to remember. And your visitors are very understanding!
6. Remind yourself as to why you are an entrepreneur - for the flexibility! It's amazing how inflexible we are when it comes right down to it - even though we SAY we want it...we most often have a hard time putting that flexibility into practice.
7. If you start to stress out, journal your thoughts. It is an easy an quick thing to do. Stream-of-consciousness-writing. Just blurt it out. Once it's on paper you can get the feelings out and figure out what you want to do about it - choice 1: be upset about something you can't 100% control OR choice 2: Take a deep breath and enjoy the time you have with them.

The people in our lives are so very important. If you were on your death bed tomorrow, would you say, "I wish I spent more time working?" Be grateful for the time. It's sometimes hard to find the positive but not that hard! As an entrepreneur or sales professional you have to be an optimist or you will never make it!

As for my Aunt-in-law...I'm enjoying my visit with her and doing whatever I can to help her with her fundraiser. It's more fun and a nice break! My stuff can wait a few days!

Launching a Business and Learning Curves

Opus=Work * Vesta=Goddess of family * Ego=Self/Conciousness
It's interesting, when you launch a company, that there are many learning curves. There are small learning curves and large learning curves. One of the biggest for me, is technology. This blog is a learning curve! I know enough to get myself in trouble but not enough to do it all on my own. The trouble part is that I'm trying to do all the website work myself to save money. We are a small start up and a non-profit. Until we get going, there isn't a whole lot to go around. I end up spending a lot of time learning so that I can do it myself...for free. There are good parts and bad parts to learning curves.

Remember this: Time is Money!

1. Do you know enough to not waste time? I feel I can get myself into trouble but I try to ask for help as much as possible. This is not typical for me. I'm one of those that will sit with a puzzle for hours until I figure it out. I don't have time to do that now. I need to ask for help and I'm starting to do that.

2. Are there easier alternatives...for now? Sometimes we need to have patience. At this point, re prioritize and ask yourself, "What do I really need to make my client/customers happy?" or "What do I really need right now to be able to market myself."

3. Refer to a "to-do" list before you launch/open for business. Make sure you have your product and that you can deliver. Everything else will be done if you keep it in sight.

4. Don't let details be an excuse. I can sure get caught up in minor details, that I forget the big pictures. I can also be good at say that I can't do this or that because of this other thing. Get going on that product and when you start making some money - improve.

5. Launch small. If your learning curve is super great, don't promise what you can't deliver. Just be what you can be for now. The "big" can come later.

6. Prepare. Nothing says that you can't start pricing experts to help you when you have the money. The first thing Mary Ann and I will do when we start adding members is hire a web designer and maintainer!

The good part about learning curves is that I'm know very familar with web design, hosting, some html and other stuff - the great thing about that is I can talk to an expert without sounding like a complete idiot. We'll be able save time in the future because I understand more.

The other learning curve is accounting. I'm just doing my best and hoping that any mistakes are fixable! And I'm going to try real hard to not hand an accountant a box of receipts at tax time!

If you are launching and have any good tips. Share them with us! I hope you follow our blog - we're going to put tricks, tips and ideas up here on a regular basis. Plus, I'll share the BusiMom's Time Out on Monday's.

Cheers, Lorin
Founder, CEO, Entrpreneur & Professional Moms Association: http://www.epmassociation.org/
President: Opus Vesta Soulutions: Organizational Development for Small Businesses / Coaching for you, your family and your business: http://www.lorinkmask.com/