Shakespearean Job Descriptions and Six Other Failures of Recruiting

I recently went through the job hunting process. It started in February and ended about a month ago with a job offer. (Yea for me!)  So, for five months, I sent resumes, connected with my network and interviewed...a lot!  During this adventure I got to really examine the recruiting practices of about 40-50 companies.  (I lost count - I added up 46 but I'm sure I'm forgetting some random head hunters that contacted me! Some of them were not very memorable.)

During this time, I took note as to what went well and what didn't go well, so that as an internal consultant at my new company, I can give some good recommendations.  Luckily, the new recruiter at my new job is excellent...one of the reasons I accepted the job.

Much as receptionists are the first people your customers come in contact with, recruiters are usually the first person your potential talent comes in contact with and they will judge your company based upon their experience.

Listed below are only a few of the things that really irked me during the process and I'm not talking personal.  I was sad to see so many companies failing in the recruiting process.  If they were failing with me, how many other better people did they miss out on because they aren't paying close enough attention?

1. "Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy." 
Job Descriptions That Sound like Shakespeare
~I'd say about 80% of the job descriptions I read were really a bunch of crap.  Most all of the job descriptions were way too long and way too detailed.  Plus, whoever wrote them thinks that writing fancy long sentences with big words makes them sound sophisticated and smart!  Most times I couldn't understand what what written and I have a Masters degree!  Keep it simple.  There is no reason to write like Shakespeare.

In addition, there were a few times where the job description didn't match the interview at all!

The job I ended up accepting had one paragraph when I applied.  The summary was enough to know it was the job for me!  No more than six bullet points with a summary is needed.

Another great job description had the job broken down into percentages of time spent in certain areas.  Such as 30% heading up such and such, 20% on developing new programs, etc.  Really gave a great indication of priorities for the organization.

2. "Tell me a time when you had to perform brain surgery while baking brownies."
~Hiring managers who are WAAAAAY to picky.  I spoke to an external head hunter for one position after I he had recommended me for an interview.  After I met with the hiring manager, I called him back to say that I didn't think it was going to work out and I could tell he was at his wits end with the client.  I've seen the same job posted for the last five months and a different recruiter called me for the same position.  I told them good luck.

Listen, I know it's expensive to recruit and hire folks.  However, hiring managers are spending way too much of their energy on finding someone that has every tiny experience listed on the job description, instead of thinking to themselves: "Hey this person has a Masters so she's probably not stupid and can learn what I need her to know.  More important, would I want to have lunch every day with this person?"

Look for people who are teachable and that you like...a lot.

3. Water Tower Torture is More Enjoyable than Your On-Line Job Description Application
~Stop making professionals with an CV fill out an on-line job description that takes 45 MINUTES! I wasted so much time filling out very tedious on-line applications.  Since you aren't going to check work history until you've made an offer or about to make an offer - wait until after the interviewing process.

 There were several times I quit filling out applications for companies because the process was slower than watching paint dry.  I'd rather have my finger nails pulled out with pliers.  Companies who have these horrible processes loose out on more talent than just me.  I've spoken to several high-end great professionals who tell me that they never apply to companies if they have to do more than just upload a CV in the on-line application.

I didn't have to fill out an on-line application for the job I soon start.  So super happy about that.  Resume via email, interviews, job offer - tedious paperwork after.  YES!!!  Felt very professional.

Forget the water torture tower of Sing Sing...tedious on-line applications are much worse.  STOP!

4. "Hi, I'm Carol from X Company.  Thanks for applying to the position.  What is your expected / current salary?" 
~Yep, that's right!  Salary was the second thing talked about during the first phone interview!  If they gave me the range and asked if I was still interested in interviewing, then fine!  But asking my expectation right up front is just super unprofessional.  I found I lacked confidence in the company if they are asking right up front.  I feel like the organization doesn't have buy-in to the position and isn't willing to pay what it's worth.

Just pony up and give the salary range.  Companies who were open, honest and didn't play the salary game gave me a good indication that the organization might have good transparency and high trust internally.  Low-trust companies play games.  Have confidence that you work at a great company and are offering a great opportunity.  The right person is coming for that and not just for salary.

5.  "No key or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid. What is it?" Questions designed (or not) to confuse!
~ Technical interviewing is very important for some jobs.  You want to see how people think on their feet.  However, purposely trying to trick people into failing is just plain mean.

Let me tell you a little something about the brain.  When people feel threatened they are less likely to think to their fullest capacity.  Try to find the best of the candidate.  If you think all candidates are trying to "pull one over on you," then you probably don't trust.  I'm not going to a company where the hiring manager can't even trust me in an interview.

Lack of interview structure is another biggie.  If you are going to do behavioral, technical and personal all in the same interview, create a structure and let the candidate know the plan.  Bouncing around is unsophisticated and for kids on trampolines.

6.  "Ms. Mask? Here's your blind fold for the interview."
~I was blindsided in more than one interview.  One example, is a phone interview with an out-of-town company.  The internal recruiter sent me the name of the person I was going to talk with over the phone.  She failed to supply me with a phone number in case I had phone/technical issues, which I experienced.  Worse, however, was that when I finally was on the call, there where five other people in a conference room with a speaker phone.  Slam.  Not only was I stressed out with technical issues but then I had a whole room full of people for which I was not mentally prepared.

I was rarely prepped very well - that was only one example.

Prep your candidate.   You conducted the first interview, it went well and you've now gone out on the limb to recommend them to the hiring manager...set them up for success.  Otherwise, the hiring manager may think you don't know what you are doing and neither will the candidate.  They'll think this is indicative of the organizational culture.  Recruiters are not above the company culture - they are a representative of it.

7.   "Ms. Mask?  This way to the interrogation room."
~Wrong.  80% of the people I met with did a significantly below average job during the interview.  Most asked very bad questions.  Many made it feel like an interrogation. The best made it a conversation - much like you would do on the job. 

Talk to them about the opportunity, let them know about the culture.  Get the candidates to share experiences.  Encourage them to tell a story.

Be consistent.  Pick two or three question you might ask all candidate, have a little structure but make time for free form, much like you would do when working together.

Out of the 46 or so experiences, I can count on one hand the good recruiters, hiring managers and companies I would work for based on those experiences.  I've only given you seven of the many missteps I encountered.

As an OD person, I'm appalled at the mediocrity and wonder how much better those companies would be if they spent a little time reviewing their recruiting and hiring processes.  It's simple to figure out, too.  Ask the candidates, that you offer positions, to give feedback.  Hire a talent management consultant go through a "dummy" job, interview and hiring.  They'll be happy to give feedback for improvement.

The future of your organization relies on finding the right talent...make sure they are not turned off by your recruiting and hiring team.  AND for goodness sake, offer your candidate some water!

The Work at Home Fantasy

In the first part of 2008 I worked at a non-profit healthcare company as a trainer and leadership coach. My mother-in-law lived with us full time, took care of my two girls and she was fantastic! I'm one of the lucky ones that gets along with her MIL.

Then it turned into a crazy year.

1st - My MIL decided that she wanted to move out and be on her own. She had been living with us for three years after her husband died and now wanted to be on her own for a while. She just wanted to be Grandma instead of the nanny. I TOTALLY understood. But, of course, focused on my problem of childcare. I worked in non-profit, which translated to not-much-pay. My take home would barely cover childcare in Westchester, NY. So, I started job hunting and setting myself up for the possibility that I'd be a stay-at-home mom.

2nd - My husband got laid off. He was one of the early casualties of the great bank tank of 08. He is in very specialised area where not many do what he does so, he took the summer off and played around with an antiques business. I continued to look for a new job. Even though I didn't get paid much, I at least had cheap family insurance.

3rd - At the end of August I got laid off. Oh crap. Well, Micheal decided that he'll have to go back to banking. He's still looking.

4th - While at a wedding and traveling in France, (we went because it was already mostly paid for) we found out that Lehman Brothers folded and AIG was on the brink of disaster. All that you read about in the papers about credit default swaps - those were the transactions that my husband worked on - also known as derivatives. He wasn't one of the sales guys making millions but one of the lawyers explaining that they were taking too much risk! He'll probably never make it back to banking.

5th - I go full force with job hunting. I gotten several rounds of interviews with at least 8 companies. A few of them I was the top 2 candidate. No offer has come.

So now, here I am. I think to myself. I should just start my own company. Looks like a better bet at this point.. I can take care of children and make some money.

LOL LOL LOL

What a fantasy. I'm not doing the best at taking care of my children. They watch waaaay too much TV. They are only 2.5 and 4. They need lots of attention. I'm not doing the best at my work. I have two of them and I'm not earning any income. Sigh. It's is not possible to take care of your kids and work at the same time. It is not possible. The kids want you when you are on the phone. They must think the computer is permanently attached to my hands. I can't concentrate with the constant interruptions.

I need childcare to keep them busy while I get the business going but I need money to get the childcare, but I don't see myself making a lot of money if I have to always take card of the kids. My oldest starts school full time in the fall, which is good but the other one will be here.

I know start ups take time but, I don't feel I have the time. I hope this fall will bring promise.

I'm still collecting unemployment while I interview. I'm not giving up on finding a job even though I've ventured on my own.

We have a little breathing room for now. My husband is doing OK with the antiques, he is also doing little legal work and we get health ins with that, our portfolio has bounced back a little bit and we are making out house payment...barely. I get scared some days. I know we'll make it but the gravel road is getting old. Even though it's a road it's very bumpy. He wouldn't like to know that I'm typing this but, I have to get it out. Luckily, there are only three followers and you are all friends and family.

Lorin